Sunday, January 29, 2012

Pop Goes My Neck

Tomorrow is going to be a big day for me. I have gone through four bottles of Ibuprofen in the four months that I've lived here. So to try to fix things, I'm going for the first time ever to a chiropractor. I'm not one of those people who thinks chiropractors are not for reals... I'm sure what they do is amazing- totally fantastic...

but I'm scared.

I've always been afraid that they'll snap my neck a little too much- and I'll end up dead on the floor of the quack's chiropractor's floor!  So, just in case my first visit to their office is my last visit [anywhere] I give my my official:

First Will and Testament.

I, Bakeshow, being of questionable mind and I'd-rather-not-talk-about-it body, do hereby bequeath my few sparse belongings amongst my beloved ones.

To my parents: My bills.  Good luck (which, unfortunately, Sadie, includes my car since the bank technically owns it. Sorry).
 
To my sisters (including in-laws) and nieces: my jewelry (almost all of it bought at Claire's- anything that wasn't was a gift and should go back to the giver of said gift).

To my nephews: My books (They will teach how to be perfect gentlemen and be the man of some girl's dreams).

To my brother Travis: My secret Archie comics collection.

To my brother Randy: My red feather boa (May it bring you the same luck it has brought to me).

To anyone who wants them: My DVD collection (except anything Jane Austen has already been promised to Jessica).

To DI: My clothes.

To Melissa A: My nail polish (since it's your fault I have it all in the first place).

To my Mom: My cake decorating crap  (Go Crazy).

To Wendy: My New Kids on the Block memorbelia (a little something to remember me by).

To EBAY: My Christmas Barbie collection (in exchange for the money they bring).

To the Smithsonian: My Baby Blessing dress. (Because, you know, I'm kind of a big deal and I know they're going to want some kind of memento.)

I think that about covers it.

How do you end a will? Sincerely? Uh... Yours Affectionately?

The End.

Upon survival of above said neck snapping, all bequests are hereby invalid.  Bequeath-ees are also under subject to change according to the whims of the bequeath-er, alterations can be made at a moments notice according to shifting of affection and the undeniable possibility of the bequeath-er getting really pissed off. 

Saturday, January 21, 2012

The Many Faces of Edward Rochester

Orson Welles

This is a great version- not my favorite, but good. It's missing a TON of the story- and there is a lot rearranged. I understand that Hollywood can't do word for word and that concessions must be made- but a real purist would not adore this one. Mr Welles is a fantastic Edward, although perhaps a bit too handsome.  He is sullen and broody enough though to pull off an angry, heartbroken man.


Ciaran Hinds

It's no secret. He's my favorite.  It's not the most accurate version- and it is notorious for having the world's worst onscreen kiss, but I love him. I love him. I love him!


Michael Fassbender


This is the newest version. I love this one- but again, still not perfect. I don't think there is a *perfect* to-the-book version out there. I have only seen this one once so it's difficult for me to remember what stood out to me. I just remember I liked it. But once again- he's a tad too handsome... and perhaps a bit young.

But this scene??? I die....

Timothy Dalton

Also a bit too handsome, but I like this version. This is the most complete version I've seen. It's not 100% true to the book, but there are things in this one that other versions omit. This is the only version I've seen so far that goes into St John River's love background, and one of the few that is accurate with Jane's fortune and generosity. Mr Dalton is a fantastic Mr R. sufficiently hostile and tormented. In this version they show Edward waiting outside Jane's room after the wedding... and it has the best parting scene of any other version. He's quite a contender for my favorite Edward- due to this scene. Mmmm..... How she resists I'll never know.


 Toby Stephens

I think this was the first version of Jane Eyre that I ever saw- so naturally I like it. But it's been so long since then that I've forgotten the things I love most.  But the proposal scene is swoon worthy.


William Hurt

This is one of my other favorites. Like I've already said though, none of the versions are perfect- but I really like this one. I love William as Mr R- but I think my favorite part of this version is Jane's back story. It has Anna Paquin as young Jane- and they cover some of the things and Lowood that are often left out- such as the hair cutting. But this end scene is so touching that I just fall for him every time. Sigh...


I know there are several more versions out there- and none yet have I seen that I consider a "perfect adaptation" although, that may be a contradiction of terms. Of course I would want a version that is nearly word for word to the book... I might have to write it myself. Hmmm....

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

I am the only person in the world

who has never seen an episode of
  • Phineas and Ferb
  • Lost
  • The Bachelor(ette)
  • CSI (any city... I watched ten minutes of one once and was so grossed out I've never returned)
who has never seen Brad Pitt act in a movie (Megamind doesn't count because it's just a voice). [I've only ever seen him act in an episode of Friends]

who doesn't like Neal Diamond. Sorry... he just sounds like he's constipated when he sings. (although- I will allow that I like the song "Sweet Caroline- but the Glee version").

who doesn't like the movie "A Christmas Story".

who has never had a second date.

who has never been to the Idaho Potato Expo (ok... we can limit that to "the only person from Idaho")

who has no idea who the Kardashians are... or why they're famous. Or why the world is so concerned with their procreation.

who has never seen "The Notebook".

who has never been a patient in the ER (I'd never even *been* in an ER until I started working in one).

who has not eaten a cake pop. (I don't even think I've seen one in real life- pictures only).

And I can't see that any of that is going to change anytime soon. (except the Notebook is on my "to see" list).[and knock on wood to the ER]



There's lots of other stuff too- I've been compiling this list mentally for a while- I really need to learn to write things down. Maybe I'll add to it as time goes by.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Dreamy

This is what I dreamed about last night.


I want to back to sleep.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

It's not a problem. I can quit anytime I want to.

I have an addiction.

I don't need an intervention though, mm'kay? In fact, most of my friends/family are enablers.

I suffer from enjoy every minute of my Anglophilia.

If it's from the UK, I love it (except fish and chips... sorry... just can't do it).

I love books by



and



and



and



I often quote things by




I have been watching this and this lately. Just because.

This site* made me late for work today. I've spent far too much time drooling over it. Especially this post, this postthis postthis post and especially this post. (not on the site yet is this man).

Col Brandon, Mr Darcy, Edward Rochester, Mr Thornton and Capt Wentworth are my reasons for living.

I agree with the author of the site 100% when she says "crying British men are my porn."  Oh. Heck. Yes.

*beware the language!

Friday, January 6, 2012

Kid History

If you haven't seen these yet- you need to watch them.

No.

I'm sensing you have a concern. What would keep you from watching these videos?

I don't have time.

Ok, so what you're saying is you feel you don't have the time to watch these videos, is that what you're saying?

Yes.

How do you think watching these videos will help you in your life?

[blank stare]

What do you think you could do to make time to watch these videos?

Well... I guess I could call in sick to work, or just show up late.

I think that's a great idea. I know you have it in you to make time to watch these videos.  Will you watch them?

Yes.








I love them all- BUT my favorites are 3, 4, and 7.

Oh... and just to explain the above conversation, I was going through my scriptures the other day and I found a laminated copy of the "Commitment Pattern" from my mission.  I guess it still works.  :)