Missing Melanie

I really really REALLY miss my sister. It's still a rare day that I go without crying- or tearing up at the very least. I'm still having trouble looking at pictures of her. I lose it every time I see her handwriting. So many times a day I think- "Oh, I need to call and tell Mel..." It's usually some random bit of geekiness that only she would appreciate.

Also, I find myself using the phrase, "The last time I  [fill in any random activity] my sister was alive." Over the last week or so it's become less frequent, and I'm really trying not to think about stuff like that. It's like I've started measuring time by her passing.

I wonder what she's doing. Is she working hard? Is she still partying? Does she miss us? or is it easier for her now because she has a better view of the Big Picture? I firmly believe that when you pass on- you keep your personality and habits from this life, so is she able to watch the Olympics? Because seriously- she loved them. Or is she busy sharing the gospel- you know, doing more important stuff?

This is the last pic of the two of us. Christmas Adam- I wanted proof she was at the party before she left.

It still hardly seems real. It's like she's still here- just not somewhere I can talk to her.