but I'm scared.
I've always been afraid that they'll snap my neck a little too much- and I'll end up dead on the floor of the
First Will and Testament.
I, Bakeshow, being of questionable mind and I'd-rather-not-talk-about-it body, do hereby bequeath my few sparse belongings amongst my beloved ones.
To my parents: My bills. Good luck (which, unfortunately, Sadie, includes my car since the bank technically owns it. Sorry).
To my sisters (including in-laws) and nieces: my jewelry (almost all of it bought at Claire's- anything that wasn't was a gift and should go back to the giver of said gift).
To my nephews: My books (They will teach how to be perfect gentlemen and be the man of some girl's dreams).
To my brother Travis: My secret Archie comics collection.
To my brother Randy: My red feather boa (May it bring you the same luck it has brought to me).
To anyone who wants them: My DVD collection (except anything Jane Austen has already been promised to Jessica).
To DI: My clothes.
To Melissa A: My nail polish (since it's your fault I have it all in the first place).
To my Mom: My cake decorating crap (Go Crazy).
To Wendy: My New Kids on the Block memorbelia (a little something to remember me by).
To EBAY: My Christmas Barbie collection (in exchange for the money they bring).
To the Smithsonian: My Baby Blessing dress. (Because, you know, I'm kind of a big deal and I know they're going to want some kind of memento.)
I think that about covers it.
How do you end a will? Sincerely? Uh... Yours Affectionately?
Upon survival of above said neck snapping, all bequests are hereby invalid. Bequeath-ees are also under subject to change according to the whims of the bequeath-er, alterations can be made at a moments notice according to shifting of affection and the undeniable possibility of the bequeath-er getting really pissed off.